Can you remember ONE moment in time when your life changed forever?
Some of you may have heard stories of people who had an epiphany moment and their lives were never the same again. They then simply up their roots, follow their calling and decide to take on the world on their own terms.
Well, that’s just what it happened to me over 10 years ago when I was visiting Nirvana School in South India. Ever since I experienced unconditional love for the first time in my life, I have been a transformed human being.
Do check out the full story of exactly what happened to me that day. The rest is history as my involvement with Nirvana School ultimately led me to pursue a career in coaching, writing, blogging, publishing books and public speaking.
So my personal transformation has impacted not only the Nirvana School children but the many people who have read my books, subscribed to my blog and have been personally coached by me.
Never under-estimate the power of a single moment!
We can all do so much for the world around us if we choose to do so.
And we can all dramatically improve our own life if we really want to.
Recently, when I was looking back on this year and planning for 2013, I got present to just how much I enjoyed coaching and transforming people’s lives. And I intent to take my coaching practice to a new level in 2013.
More on that later but this brings me on nicely to today’s blog post and to one of my mentors from 10 years ago when I first got into this thing called “coaching”.
C. J. Hayden is one of the most experienced coaches in the world – thousands of other coaches have benefited from her pioneering work and deep experience of what it takes to coach powerfully.
She approached me earlier this year asking if I wanted to contribute to her new book – “50 Ways Coaches Can Change the World” (Amazon USA / Amazon UK)
Of course I jumped at the opportunity – it was an honour and privilege to be asked to be amongst 50 coaches from around the world featured in her book.
The result is a stunning little book packed with literally hundreds of ideas for you and me to change the world. Despite what the title may indicate, the book is aimed for everyone and not just coaches – it’s a little “bible” and compilation of ideas to help you make a difference in the world.
To me it shows once again that you don’t need to be a “coach” to change the world – you just need the desire and willingness to do so!
So please do check out the book online (Amazon USA / Amazon UK) – and let me know how you get on.
($1 from each copy sold will be donated to the International Coach Federation Foundation )
My contribution in the book is #42 – “Use your Blog or Social Networks to Advocate for Good”
So now you know why C.J. Hayden asked me to contribute to her book! To me, my blog is just about advocating good in the world – and also about making the best of our lives whilst we can.
“A few words and a link can transform a ripple into a sea change” – C. J. Hayden
And this is what I said in the book:-
“So many of us go through our lives remaining silent about what really matters to us, the world and other people. It is as if we are on auto-pilot, day after day.
It is so easy to become indifferent, remain silent and not do anything about some of the huge challenges the world faces today – such as social injustice, poverty, famine, global warming, diminishing resources and so on.
It’s now time to stop being silent. Look around your life today and see where you are being silent – and ask yourself why.”
Indeed, are YOU being silent in your life? Ask yourself why?
Interview with C.J.Hayden
As you may be able to tell by now, I have been blown away by C.J.’s book. And I was over the moon when she agreed to an online interview to feature and promote the book.
We can all learn so much about life and coaching from her:-
1. C.J., you are clearly passionate about coaching. What got you on to this path?
I’ve been coaching since 1992, and when I got started, I didn’t know any other coaches. In fact, I thought I had made it up!
Three months later, I met another coach, and she introduced me to more coaches. What I discovered in those early days of coaching was that coaches seemed to be springing up independently all over the globe, almost as if something was in the air. In a sense, I think something was.
For me personally, I was working as a management consultant for midsize corporations. In the course of my work, I met many dissatisfied people. They wanted something more from their lives, and for their work to be more meaningful.
I found myself more and more engaging in conversations with people about their dreams and goals, and less about how to help the organizations they worked for function better.
I enjoyed those conversations much more than I did the work I was being paid for. And I wanted to help those dissatisfied people. So I decided to see if I could earn a living having conversations with people who wanted to change the way they were working and living.
Many of the coaches I knew in the early 90s got started in a similar way – we were already having conversations with people who wanted more from their lives, and our desire to help those people turned into what is now an established profession.
2. Please share with my readers the power of coaching? Should everyone have a coach?
Coaching is a very powerful approach to making changes in one’s career, business, or life. When you work with a coach, you partner with someone who is dedicated to support you in making the changes you desire.
You also make a commitment to work on those changes consistently, and have someone to whom you are accountable about your progress.
A coach provides you with a sounding board, an advocate, and a thinking partner. Your coach asks you the tough questions that make you think about what you want and what you’re doing, and reminds you of your own intentions.
I don’t think everyone should have a coach. Some people are very satisfied with their lives as they are, or not interested in making an effort to change right now. But when you are in the place of desiring changes, and ready to work on making them happen, a coach can help you get what you want faster and with less struggle.
3. Please tell us more about your latest book. Why 50 ways?
My new book “50 Ways Coaches Can Change the World” came about because I’ve noticed over the past few years how many coaches seem to be engaged in social change activities – work focused on sustainability, fair business practices, or social justice.
Coaches are volunteering, fundraising, starting organizations, or working with under-served communities. But despite all of these activities, there are still many coaches who feel as if they would like to do more, to work more directly for peace, or for the environment, or to alleviate poverty.
So I decided to write a book that would do three things:
- Showcase some of the ways in which coaches were already making a difference, to increase awareness about our efforts,
- Describe 50 specific ways that coaches can engage in world changing, to help those coaches who feel as if they would like to do more, and
- Provide inspiration and camaraderie to coaches already on a world changing path, to help us recognize ourselves as members of a global tribe.
4. Coaches can clearly change the world. But how can non-coaches change the world? And how can your book help?
Absolutely, anyone can change the world. The first part of my book is about how to “Change the World as a Citizen, Employee, or Business Owner.”
“You must be the change you want to see in the world” – Mahatma Gandhi
Since all coaches hold these identities in addition to being coaches, I thought it was important to point out the ways that we can make, and are making, a difference in our daily lives. This section of the book is filled with ideas and resources that any would-be world changer could benefit from.
For example, offering your professional skills pro bono to groups and individuals that could need them, or eating low on the food chain, or doing business with socially responsible companies. These are activities anyone can engage in that will help make this a better world for all of us.
5. How can my readers change the world through being coached?
I think we all have world changing impulses from time to time, and we hesitate, because we think we aren’t good enough, or we are afraid, or we feel our lives are too busy to add one more thing. These are exactly the types of concerns that coaching addresses.
As a coach, I help my clients overcome self-sabotaging thoughts and behaviour, like thinking they aren’t enough.
I help them work through their fears about taking action. I assist them in learning to make choices and decisions that align the way they spend their time with their true goals and dreams.
When you work with a coach, any goal you desire becomes more achievable, even if that goal is changing the world.
6. Not everyone wants to change the world – at the most basic level, everyone wants to avoid pain or feel pleasure. How can coaching help my readers achieve this?
In order to avoid pain or feel pleasure in your life, you need to change something!
If your job or your relationship or your finances are painful, you need a change. If you want to feel more fit or more successful or more personally fulfilled, you need a change.
Coaching is one of the best approaches available for making changes of any kind.
7. Please share 3 simple coaching tips which my readers can apply and benefit from in their daily life.
- Procrastination is always a sign of a thought or feeling you haven’t fully admitted to yourself. When you notice yourself stalling about getting a thing done, ask yourself what that thing represents to you. Try to uncover the fear, resistance, or self-doubt that is preventing you from taking action. If you can identify what’s lurking in the background, you can begin to find solutions to help you move forward.
- If you want to change or begin a habit – like exercising more often or quitting work at 5 PM – start by tracking what you’re currently doing. Just notice how often you exercise, or what time you quit work, and write it down. At the end of each week, look over what you did. This simple act of noticing and tracking will begin to change your habits in the direction you desire.
- Whenever you’re not sure what to do in a situation, ask yourself, “What do I want?” Even better, have someone else ask you this question. Much of the time, our indecision is caused because we fear we can’t have what we want. So we try to do everything but, and none of it feels right. Instead, admit what you really want, and seek a path that will begin to lead you in that direction.
8. Finally C.J., what’s next for you?
As usual, I have several things on my plate. I’m continuing to coach entrepreneurs and independent professionals, and license my Get Clients Now! program to other coaches and trainers.
I’m also engaged in social change activities, including the Send the Girls to School project and A Good Deed Tea.
I’m working on my next book, Business Blockbuster, which is about how to break through the internal blocks that prevent entrepreneurs from having a successful business. Along with writing articles, doing interviews, and speaking engagements, that should be enough to keep me busy!
Thanks C.J. – what an inspiration you are!
My Coaching Offer
As I said at the beginning, I am revamping my coaching practice in 2013. And I am making space for a few more clients in January 2013.
In preparation for that, I am offering one-off coaching sessions to 10 people at a reduced rate of just £97 (my normal rate is £250+).
The session will be over the telephone and last one hour and includes preparation notes sent to you beforehand and a follow-up email with supportive notes.
The idea of this session is to help you wrap up 2012 and prepare for 2013. The session must be scheduled by 5th January 2013 and the aim is to get you all set and ready for the New Year.
We’ll clear out all of the “stuff” that happened in 2012 – and you’ll be left with a powerful plan for 2013. The session is designed to make you feel energised, excited and ready to welcome 2013 with renewed gusto.
Currently, I only have time for 10 individual sessions like this and if this coaching by me resonates with you, I invite you to book a session right away. For your convenience, I have created a PayPal Button for you:-
Once I have received your confirmation, we can set up a mutually convenient time and we can begin in earnest!
Of course, you have the option to continue coaching with me in 2013 and we can discuss that after this initial session if that interests you.
Finally, please note that I have coached people all over the world – so this offer is for you wherever you are, thanks to the wonder of Skype 🙂
I wish you all the best for the festive period.
Also, thanks to Jason Chan for his amazing contribution at the 12.12.12 celebration in London last night (Wednesday, 12th Dec 2012) – I was lucky to be right in the front and took the two images of him which really symbolise for me the power, grace and beauty in doing what you love – and making a difference in the world.
PS Look out soon for more information about some more Kindle books I am publishing shortly.
And remember to sign up for my coaching offer if you want to start making it happen in 2013.
As a new coach, this was a great interview and interesting to learn more about C.J.Hayden. I’m looking forward to reading her book and your section. That is wonderful that you were included in the book. The clients that I work with are feeling a lot of pain, so I appreciated C.J.’s line – “In order to avoid pain or feel pleasure in your life, you need to change something!” – so true! All the best!
Cathy, welcome to the amazing world of coaching!
C.J. Hayden is sop inspirational – and please do check out her books and programs.
I wish you all the best on your coaching journey:-)
Hi C.J and Arvind,
I really enjoyed this interview.
C.J, I loved you responses to Arvind’s questions. Your words were inspiring and reminded me that we as coaches really do, do great work, even if I do say so myself!
For me personally, helping people become unstuck from problems so they can positively create change in the life is a feeling like no other.
I wish you great success with your book and Arvind all the best for your coaching practice in 2013!
Wishing you both a Happy Festive Season! 🙂
Thanks Hiten for all your kind words and good wishes!
Onwards and upwards in 2013:-)
Coaching is an interesting topic for me though I had some bitter experiences lately. Really liked the interview (Btw, I am a first timer here – came via the Top 50 blogs on PD) and your narration and pics from the Nirvana school.
wow, a school changed your complete life!! Thats really something to learn from, you followed your heart! Indeed helping out others is always a good feeling, but we have to know how to help others but for that we need to understand people and why they behave such way.
Srihari, yes a school changed my life completely!
And actually we don’t always need to know how to help others – we just have to follow our heart:-)