This is a guest post from Tess Marshall
Do you like to cook or do you just hate the thought of being in the kitchen?
If not cooking, what is it that you really don’t like doing?
So often in our lives, we do things without really putting our heart into it.
We then just go through the motions and this shows in the mediocre results we get.
At one time, I didn’t like to cook, at all!
I was never inspired to cook. I used to do so because I have to.
In the past I haven’t planned my cooking well. I wait until the last minute and prepare meals without much thought or love.
Then one day everything changed!
I learned to drop the words “I have to…” and simply substituted “I get to…”
Maybe you love to cook, but you may have other necessary tasks which you feel you have to do, and which make you feel like a victim.
When are you flooded with thoughts like “poor me” and “life is unfair” or “I have too”?
Notice the shift in perception with the sentences below:-
“I have to go to the store today and pick up something for dinner.”
In between the words, can you hear that I dread the task and I’m tired?
Now check out this sentence:-
“I get to go to the store today and pick up something special for hubs for dinner.”
Notice the excitement and gratitude for the abundance of food and a dinner partner.
By changing a single word, I created a shift in perception and attitude!
“I have to” creates feelings of indifference and obligation – cooking is a chore.
“I get to” creates a feeling of gratitude and privilege – cooking is a joy!
Practice catching yourself saying, “I have to” or “I should.” Then substitute the phrase “I get to.”
You will feel a shift that creates a new emotional state.
You can develop this further by seeing each of the individual steps with appreciation and gratitude. So using my example above of cooking, I came up with these statements:-
I get to go to the store and pick up some wonderful fruits and vegetables today for dinner.
I get to enjoy the colours and the taste of the purple cabbage and red juicy tomatoes.
I get to take in the aroma of fresh cilantro and basil.
I get to return my cart after I unload my groceries in a state of gratitude.
I get to set a beautiful and simple table.
I get to sit across from hubs and gaze with loving eyes as we eat together.
How fortunate I am to afford the food and have a life partner!
My attitude change keeps me in the present moment.
Shopping, cooking and eating become delightful privileges. I am blessed. Time stands still.
Using “I get to” is changing my life in all areas
For instance, I have decided that I’m going to increase fresh food in my diet and possibly go vegan.
This is too big for me to do all at once. So instead of acting impulsively, I am taking baby steps forward.
To start with, on Mondays I don’t eat dairy or animal products.
Each month, I will add another day of healthy eating. By April 2011, vegan or not, I will have a healthy diet.
Taking seven months to change my diet may sound like a long time but when you consider I could live until ninety it isn’t!
Substituting “I have to” with “I get to” will also transform your life.
Begin with a task or a change that overwhelms you. For example, it could be going green, exercising, or losing weight.
Then simply keep the following statements uppermost in your mind.
I get to recycle.
I get to contribute to healing the earth.
I get to exercise.
I get to try hiking, rollerblading, yoga, spinning and running.
I get to shop, cook and eat less.
I get to ask for support.
Instead of being filled with dread, these shifts in energy will help you feel excited to be alive!
If you are a writer, then try these:-
I get to excel in my niche.
I get to create new products.
I get to learn SEO
I get to respond to comments.
I get to make new friends.
The list is clearly endless. Here are my statements when I am travelling and about to board a flight:-
I get to travel today.
I get to stand in line for security.
I get to allow someone cut in front of me.
I get a chance to smile at the security officers.
I get to mentally bless those around me.
I get to choose to arrive 2 hours early so all will go smoothly.
I get to bring extra luggage.
I get to bring healthy snacks for the long flight.
I get to make friends with the stranger sitting next to me.
I get to pick up my luggage when I arrive.
I get to see the world.
I get to fly!
The way forward for you – get going!
So there you are. Take your joy, delight and gratitude to the next level – substitute “I have to” with “I get to.”
Using one little word changes your mood, your relationships and your life. We are truly blessed.
What will you get to do today?
Please do share below – only if you want to of course:-)
Read more inspiring articles from Tess Marshall at The Bold Life.
Tess has a master’s degree in counselling psychology and has guided people from all walks of life in their quest for greater meaning, purpose and happiness.Aline Salazar